Once upon a time in Asia...

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Funny how time flies... it's only been  2 months since we left India, but the reality of it is already starting to fade.  I knew it would all start to feel like a dream, but maybe not so quickly...  when freezing my way in and out of the Metro here, my favourite place to recall is Sri Lanka. Maybe because it was the last place we managed to squeeze in before giving up the sun for snow, or maybe because it was simply magical.

Either way, if you've not been - GO. Now the troubles in the north have settled down, they need the tourists to come and I highly recommend you go before the country changes, it still feels very unspoilt... but once the droves arrive I imagine it will go the way of all many Asian holiday resorts and become a bit tacky round the edges...

The biggest surprise to me was quite how much jungle there is, from the moment we stepped off the plane and headed for Kandy in the car with our hilarious driver for the week, we were overwhelmed by mists and tropical greenery. The further inland to the ancient cities you go - the more dense it becomes. Indiana Jones eat your heart out.

But let's not forget the idyllic south either. If you can close your eyes to the obvious tom foolery of rebuilding whole villages on the precariously exposed sands of tsunami battered beaches, you will be blown away by the beauty of it all. I feel I also need to mention Colombo, as it often gets a bad rep - but having lived in Mumbai, I can honestly say it compares favourably. Pavements, shops, galleries, cosmopolitan bars & restaurants, the barefoot cafe alone had me wishing I'd booked a trip in my first year in Asia! Drinks at the verandah bar at the Galleface. Yes please.

Having said all this, it is still in many ways - as my good friend Helen described it - India Light: Terrible driving, general disorganisation, some questionable food items...  all are very much the order of the day. And their treatment of the poor stray dogs made India look like one giant RSPCA shelter - even B took to carrying his leftovers around with him to feed to the poor mites we encountered everywhere. Seriously, there needs to be something done about it...

Highlights of the trip:

• Helga's folly in Kandy - an unforgettable and somewhat spooky hotel run by Lady Helga - will say no more, just visit.
• Kandalama in Dambula. Geoffery Bawa architecture in lush jungle. 
• Climbing Sigirya rock to see the storm approaching...
• Sleeping to the sounds of the waves in Unawatuna.
• B almost turning veggie because of the turtle hatchery...

I've added some photos to make you jealous... hope you like,

More soon. Sleep time now.

BNBx

Slumcat Millionaire...

A small tribute to my incredible travelling feline companion, who has literally come from a dustbin outside Subway in Mumbai, to DC - with a short stint in Manhattan no less - where to be fair she seemed happier than Rockville!

Thank you Izzy for taking the hectic moves in such good feline grace and not yet soiling the foreign office sofas, we promise to leave Rockville soon and take you to a more civilised environment... the landlord said there might even be mice!

The only cat I know who will fetch a ball, open doors and answer when spoken to, she keeps me company day in, day out, my feet warm at night...  she is worth every penny of the money we spent shipping her here and is by far our favourite Indian takeaway.

BNBx

From Bollywood to Hollywood, well not quite...

but my travels across the big pond have led me to a now very cold Washington DC.

It's nice. Very nice. But to date, I'll be honest, I've not seen so much of it... as I'm stuck in a little known place called Rockville. Actually not that little known... REM wrote a song called "Don't go back to Rockville" Jeeez, need I say more?

Imagine a cross between Twin Peaks, the M25 and Aggrestic from Weeds, that's Rockville..

It's not for forever though, so I must not gripe too much. We will eventually be moving to a tiny flat surrounded by huge Embassies in central DC, everyone will mistakenly think we're rather well off - I will be able to walk to Dunkin Donuts (the coffee is cheaper and way better than Starbys) a discovery led by Lady Adventure Williams, thank you very much! and B will be able to hoof it to work rather than having to cross a 6 lane freeway and then catching a 40 min red line train into the centre...

India feels like a long way away. It's not just the ridiculous drop in temperature... it's the colours too. Everything here is just a bit beige and drab. I miss the pinks and reds and general flamboyancy of Bombay, dare I say it... I even miss the noise. It's so damn quiet here, I can here myself think!

But then there's always REM to fill the void... Enjoy :)

BNB x

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=6fXCjSgItgw

The Peter Pan Syndrome...

The truth is, most men suffer from this - given the choice they'd probably opt to never grow up and spend a life in glorious limbo, somewhere between puberty and serious responsibility. As for Wendy, don't kid yourself, the minute she turned her back, even the green spandex Panman was off flying around with Sue, Sarah (and maybe Bob) too.

Many things have got me thinking about this, a couple of incidents very close to home which i wont mention on here and a very interesting article of the same name in the Times today.

Sometimes, i see so much deceit and heartache around me, I wonder why we bother at all, but then I'll go a nice wedding and see a couple so very in love, I'll remember why. Still, it seems even marriage is not enough to stop tragedy these days (whilst i loathe mentioning it on here but Rooney, Pitt, Woods) ... which again begs the question - if that's your game - why bother in the first place?

 Oh i remember, i mean surely we've all learnt something from Patsy Kensit... a super profitable divorce!

Sigh...

BNB x

No more madame...

Our final day in Bombay and the reality is finally sinking in. One of the most shocking realisations i had whilst powdering my nose in a now depressingly empty bathroom, was how accustomed I have become to answering to the call of .."madame" or "maam" Imagine??? If someone had told me 3 years ago that was the case i would have laughed it off, now i am horrified to say that I'll miss being addressed in such a manner and 'oy you' 'lady' 'etc just wont have the same ring to it... sigh

As long as B does not expect me to call him Sir from now on...

BNB x

The incident of the impossible apple juice...

I know i said don't start me on this... but here goes:

Having enjoyed a refreshing apple juice (canned i might add) with my breakfast in aforementioned haveli hotel, i decided to continue the trend and have some with my dinner. Not very big night i know, but it was really hot ok!

Upon asking for my apple juice i was given the curious reply by waiter "No madame, not possible"

Surely there must be some mistake, why i only had some a few hours ago - I'll try again. please sir - can I have some apple juice?

"Not possible madame"

Bearing in mind i was not asking them to crush any apples between the thighs of a nubile maiden, i decided to pursue the matter.

" I am thirsty, i do not want beer, please can i have the juice i had this morning?"

At this point i was told actually yes, i could have some after all and after only 15 minutes was presented with a nice chilled apple juice, which i downed in one thirsty gulp and promptly asked for a refill. This it turns out was too much...

4 different waiters came in turn to take this order, all looking nervous and edgey. but after half an hour, no refill. I decided to go the bar and investigate... at which point i was told, there was critical shortage of apple juice in the city, they had searched high and low but not another can was to be found anywhere...

So it turns out that apple juice was now indeed impossible. So i settled for a very doable but slightly flat diet coke (oh and some food poisoning to boot, loved that food poisoning!) Lady Adventure Williams found this amusing anyway...

BNBx

Making friends with the prince

Firstly apologies for rather somber tone in last posting, was having a true melt down and not just from the heat.

Back in Bombay for last few days and recalling some of the funnier moments from all the India travels and a recent trip to dusty Rajasthan with Lady Adventure Williams, (as she shall now be known) is perhaps one of the funniest.

Morning time, having arrived in Jaisalmere at 5.20am on overnight train from Jodphur we arrived at our haveli hotel, to find our room had been given away to some other lucky guests. Brilliant. Now don't be thinking we were apologised to, instead our zealously moustachiod receptionist merely pointed at some rugs on the floor and offered "now you sleep here till room available. No room till lunchtime..."

Sigh. Cue angry & tired Barbie "but i have reservation -this is not good enough, get me the manager!"
Moustache "sir is sleeping Madame"
Barbie: "Well wake him up!"
Moustache: "ok....."
Cue woken up Manager " hello, madame what is problem, how can i help"
Barbie: "problem, i'll tell you the problem - this is SHIT and if you don't find us a room we'll leave immediately" etc etc

Needless to say this was all sorted and a room was found... however, when in room and reading tourist bumpf we came across some interesting info, "the hotel was still run by some royal family of Jodphur, in fact the prince himself can often be found working in reception and kitchen"

Turns out my opening gambit to prince Vikram Singh of Jodphur, grandson of Maharaj Kishan Singh ji, was
" this is shit". hhhm not my finest hour.

But they had their revenge. Our free dinner that evening had a nice side helping of tourist diarrhea... and don't even start me on the apple juice...

the shame...

BNBx

Life's a bitch

Despite being in one of the most amazing spots on the planet, the very jungle like Sri Lanka - am reaching meltdown levels. New house to be #2 in the land of chicken and waffles has also fallen through, for no good reason other than nonsense beauracracy.

People often say that when you find your house, you just 'know', you open the door and can feel yourself living in it... that's what this was like. But i'm going to put those feelings aside and box them up with all the other disappointing events of the last few years.

Bolshy Barbie has gone out for the day I'm afraid and has been replaced by Browbeaten Barbie.

The good news is that the sun is still shining and i can play on the beach in attempt to forget.

2 weeks left in Asia now, guess i should make the most of it.

Laters

BNB x

You never get used to the cows...

Bless those errant, holy Indian cows... always in the way, think i might miss them the most.

Blonde in Bombay 2

A good male buddy of mine once said to me that upon arriving home from a long day at work in Bombay, he could judge the mood of 'her indoors' simply by counting the pairs of flip flops outside his front door... the greater the number of flip flops, the more dangerous the mood.

Needless to say there are many flip flops outside my door today and B should be worried about  what awaits him when he chirpily bundles through the door later...

If you've not had the pleasure of living in Asia, then you may be wondering - what's with all the flip flops? Let me explain:  it basically signifies there are many supposedly useful and busy handymen, collection men (in my case packers) and of course supervisors running around your house probably not fixing things and making a great bloody mess.

As the big P Day looms over us (P Day is packing day, and a bit like D Day, except without any fire (i hope) but possibly some serious casualties along the way.) my house is overrun with people i don't know and i need to escape.

However it's about 40 degrees outside and my head hurts from the late night Baileys encounter...  time to don some large BNB shades and be brave...

BNBx

Blonde in Bombay... 1

A week away from India and you tend to forget all the things that made you want to leave in the first place. But give me one day back and I'm antsy about the roads, dwindling in the heat and my tummy is waging an internal war with my dinner... suddenly 21 hours to NY does not seem like such a bad journey after all!

But then, if i'm honest, sitting in an packed up apartment, remembering what will always be thought of as those crazy years in India, i realise that if I actually face the fact that my next big flight will be one way outta here... i'm filled with sadness. What a wonderful place this has been.

Highlights:
1. Enabling Ma&Pa to visit the Taj Mahal
2. Watching the tea pickers in Darjeeling, in the shadow of the mighty Kanjenjunga.
3. Tuktuks, every day. Those guys work long hours and still only charge about 40p for a ride
4. Watching the girls at Sharanam orphanage dance, just because they love to...
4. Learning to appreciate the true meaning of food poisoning... who needs Atkins diet when you can have a friendly amoeba!


If you're a friend on FB, then you'll know today was a not a good India day. I trod on a dead rat, i fought with B and jetlag led me to start writing a blog at 3am! But fear not... my rose tinted glasses will be coming out again soon.

Bit more baileys, a nice snap of Kanjenjunga for those poor mortals who have not yet had the pleasure :) then time for bed...

BNB x

Blonde in Bombay... Intro

A short intro is perhaps necessary...  Left London town in March 2007 to follow my heart to Bombay, where he who shall be known as B, (those in the know, know why!) had arranged himself a nice cushy foreign office posting... Daydreams of cocktails on the verandah daaahlin soon gave way to a hectic lifestyle of back to back traffic jams, open sewage and absolutely nowhere where you could walk in a decent pair of heels...

Having said that a rewarding career and heady mix of festivals, parties and non-stop travel ensured that my heart soon belonged to India.

I am now in the last 4 weeks of my indian adventure. A life sipping tea at the Whitehouse has called us to the suprisingly pretty DC, though when asked where our next posting is... my usual response is, oooooh we're moving a couple of hours outside NY

The need to blog has been strong in this one for the longest time, so at 3am as i sit amid boxes, bags for charity, and a rather large Baileys... I have begun. I promise if you stick with me, it'll be a fun ride.

BNB x